Make eye contact is an the age-old communication tip. And it is important. Using your eyes to focus on the other person, ’see’ what they are saying and more importantly, feeling, contributes to effective communication.

But…what if you aren’t seeing them? Then what?  Nearly all the clients I am working with rarely or NEVER ’see’ their prospects or customers. The communication is by telephone (including Skype) and written (email, IM, even ’snail’ mail).  So if eye contact is that important, how much communication is lost when we don’t see each other?

Some history:  For decades authors have shared Dr. Mehrabian’s stats on communication effectiveness:  58% is based on body language (including eye contact), 35% on tone of voice and 7% the actual words we use.  Overgeneralizing his research has caused much debate in the research community on its applicability to all communication situations.  I think whether the actual percentages are accurate or not – it makes the point…COMMUNICATION is complex!

We can also deduct from the tone of his research that without ’seeing’ our prospects and customers, we can miscommunicate easily because body language is one key aspect to clear and accurate messaging!  That is why I propose that we should be more concerned with ear contact than ever before.

Yes, some may call it listening…I like ear contact as the name of this skill and concept. Why?  Listening is good – ear contact adds more to the nuance of effective listening.  We are always in CONTACT with the other party…we aren’t just waiting to talk – we are connecting to their words, intent, emotion and therefore their ‘hot buttons’ that can make or break our sales!

The definition of contact (from dictionary.com) is “immediate proximity or contact.”  Isn’t that what is important in every communication we have?  That we need to be immediately ‘near’ to the person, their problems, opportunity, wants and needs?

Tips for effective ear contact:

• Listening without distractions. Stop the multi-tasking!
• Taking notes on key points.
• Summarizing your understanding to verify what you heard is what they wanted you to know.
• Paying attention to the intent and emotion that comes with their words…and their pauses, hesitations and background noise.

Making good ear contact allows you to ‘hear’ opportunity … that you can then translate into sales.

What do you think? What connotation does EAR CONTACT have for you?

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Filed Under: Collaborative Selling, Sales Productivity, Sales Tips
Tags: Listening, Sales Tips, sales tools

It is amazing at how often I observe professionals – sales, leaders and service professionals – realize that they aren’t as effective in listening as they first thought. The realization comes through activities and short assessments through our training workshops.

The focus on active listening – which is more than ‘waiting for your turn to speak’ is one of the key take-aways.

Key tips on Active Listening:

• Listen for more than words – intent and emotion matter
• Send signals that let the other person know you are really listening – verbal and physical signals
• Paraphrase what you hear without word-for-word repeating
• Ask follow-on questions
• Remain open to the information being shared before judging or jumping in

In looking for an easy way to assess active listening skills, I found this FREE Active Listening Quiz by McGraw-Hill Irwin. The results also give tips to help in the areas of listening that will benefit you the most.

Personally? My results show that I need to postpone evaluation when I am listening and to stop interrupting others. Nailed me accurately! And the busier I am, the worse I am in these two areas – which is no excuse!

Go ahead and take the 15 question quiz…when you are ready to ‘hear’ the results

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Filed Under: Sales Productivity, Success Tips
Tags: Listening

These last few weeks have been great for prospecting.  People seem to feel ‘they’ve made it through 2009′ and are looking for ways to advance their business in 2010.  Our ongoing nurturing all year is now paying off with callbacks, appointments and commitments.  Yeah!

One of the sales calls I had a few weeks ago, I’d like to repeat over and over and over.  Why?  Because the prospect was looking for ONE specific service and by the end of our conversation we were discussing multiple.  In dissecting why the call went so well (a good practice so we can repeat those actions that worked), I found that I had: 

1. Listened to the intent of what he wanted to accomplish, not just WHAT he wanted to do now.
2. Waited.  Instead of offering him a recommendation immediately (which I could have on the ONE item), I expanded the discussion with further questions that uncovered some underlying information that was truly what needed to be addressed first.
3. Asked permission to ask questions that weren’t directly related to what he called about.
4. Summarized the broader picture and the frustration and costs associated with it.
5. Presented the solution directly tied into his situation and the value he would experience in the long run.
6. After he said “Yes, this is what we need to do first, isn’t it?”  I expressed confidence in his choice and what he would gain from it. 

It was a lot of effort to keep to task.  And it was one of those situations where I hadn’t time to prepare – he called me out of the blue.  But I had just been preparing for another meeting and quickly pulled my list of questions out.  I also have a list of questions that I can quickly adjust on the spot to a situation such as this. 

I’m sure you’ve had some of these ‘magical sales moments’ too.  What did you learn from them?  Making the time to dissect and extract WHAT and HOW happened, will help you repeat it again the next time.

Now to continue making calls today and follow the six actions above.

Hope your day is productive too! 

P.S.  Yes, he did accept the recommendation – which was a 75% higher sale than the original request  

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Filed Under: Uncategorized
Tags: Listening, prospecting, sales tips

Assumptions.  Guessing or thinking we KNOW what someone else is thinking, needing, objecting to, etc.  How many relationships and sales are lost because of assumptions?  Of course that’s a rhetorical question – we can’t know for sure.  The real question is – how many are lost to you?

Every week I work with sales reps and non-traditional sales professionals (IT consultants for example) on consultative selling skill training.  Our process is 6-9 weeks long depending on the course.  We use the methodology of long-term behavior change process to help everyone “stick” the skils land behaviors.  Why? It takes some people 4-5 weeks to REALLY understand what it takes to stop and listen.  Their mode is go-go-go and “I know” and many assumptions are made to keep moving forward. 

Example?  I have many business examples, but I’m going to use a personal example that is so poignant.  I have a relative who does not listen.  Even when she asks a question – it is closed and assumptive.  The following exchange is a PERFECT example of what happens when we assume.

Sarah was talking with another relative, Carrie, who had been dealing with some heart medical issues for months.  Here is the exchange:

• Sarah, “So, you had a stint put in?”
• Carrie, “No.”
• Sarah, “Oh, they did the scope thing instead.”
• Carrie, “Nope.”
• Sarah, “Hmmm. They probably decided medications were the best thing for now then.”
• Carrie, “No.”

 After several more reiterations of this approach Sarah gave up and moved to another conversation…still having no idea what happened to Carrie.

As I observed this I wanted to scream “ASK her a question instead of “guessing” what happened!!”  Carrie, whose known Sarah for 50+ years knew the drill and wasn’t going to play. Honestly – just writing out that dialogue has raised my blood pressure – it is SO frustrating to be in one of those conversations!

How much easier it could have been, if Sarah had asked, “I heard you were having some medical problems, what’s going on?”  Or “What happened?”  That’s it!  Carrie would have answered and both would be better off.

Do you see this at work?  Do you catch yourself and realize that you didn’t get the information you needed from your prospect, customer, teammate, or manager because you didn’t really ask a relevant question and wait for the answer? 

When my husband and I were purchasing a kitchen set, the salesperson took the same approach:

• Seller: “You probably have family parties.”
• Us: “Yes.”
• Seller: “I’m sure you are going to want extra chairs.”
• Us: Silence…there wasn’t anything to answer.
• Seller: “I bet you want this today and we don’t have it in stock.”

After several similar shopping experiences, I said “I wish someone would just ASK us something.”  The sales process took a lot longer than it needed to.  The seller could have just asked, “Tell me about how you use your kitchen?” or “What type of entertaining do you do?”   I would have given him what he needed to make a recommendation.  Instead, we were the ones asking the questions to filter out our options.   

We’re all a work in progress – and each day if we can focus on one, seemingly small, communication action, those around us will be better off for it. 

In fact, a great tip from Pat at CVS Caremark this week – she took all the little tips and wrote one action item on index cards.  Each morning she shuffles the cards and selects one to be her focus of the day.  What a great idea! 

And if the tips includes stopping to listen, letting the other person answer, asking questions without assumptions, focusing on others’ intent and words, etc. we’ll learn a lot that day that might save us a lot of time, energy and frustration later.  It keeps us all from the adage you might have heard about assuming, “When you assume, it makes an as_ out of U and me!” 

What do you think?  What reaction do you have to the dialogue I shared above?

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Filed Under: Uncategorized
Tags: consultative selling, Listening, Sales Tips

Wait.  For what? Answers.  How long do you wait for a response after asking a question?  It is estimated that people wait 1-4 seconds for a response to an asked question.  Time it and you’ll see it is true.  

If you allow more time – even up to 20-30 seconds - for a response you may hear something spectacular.  Yes it will seem like you are waiting forever but watch/listen to what happens when you do wait.  Information will come – and the richness of the response may surprise you.

Some people need to process the informationin their head before it comes out their mouth (some other people should giv  this a try .  When we interrupt someone with another question, rephrasing the initial question or answering the question ourselves, we frustrate them and shut down communication.  Then we have to work harder to get the information out.

Today, pay attention to your wait time.  Whatever it is, focus on doubling it and see what you can learn.

I believe it will be worth the wait.

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Filed Under: Uncategorized
Tags: Listening